Painting for Madiba, burger thieves and R Kelly

Since there was no mad rush for the 50th membership spot on this blog I am resorting to bribery. Whoever puts me out of my misery (of watching and waiting) will receive a free Mercedes-Benz ML 63 AMG (kindly sponsored by the Gauteng Department of Agriculture and Rural Development) and five bottles of Johnnie Walker Blue Label.*
I had a rather unusual morning yesterday. I spent it painting the walls of a building that was once the headquarters of "Non-White Affairs", where the notorious passes were issued to black workers. The building, 80 Albert Street, downtown Joburg, is now the home of a ministry housing teenagers, mothers and their children. As a newspaper, we are doing some volunteering there for the 67 Minutes for Mandela initiative. Our work includes repainting the television room on the floor where the teenage girls live and revamping a small outside yard.
My team was in charge of finishing the first coat of paint, doing some wall repairs and messing paint on every inch of the floor and every fibre of clothing (including my Levis). But what a soul soothing experience...
When I got back to the office, I was reminded how crazy the crime and courts beat can be. There were three stories that caught my eye:
The first was about seven men arrested "for failure to pay Wimpy". As the headline suggested, the seven guys ate up a storm (R890) but came up with a feast of excuses when it was time to pay. They said one of their friends had run away, leaving them to wash dishes. The owners of the Soweto-based Wimpy were not exactly interested and called the cops, who promptly arrested the lot for theft. At least they won't go hungry in the holding cells.
The second was about a waiter from Kauai Juice (that healthy place we all look at while lining up at Steers) who was arrested for scanning credit cards. The 31-year-old failed to rock up at court, claiming "an inflamed throat and diarrhoea". An arrest warrant was issued. I wonder what gave him the diarrhoea? Too much Super Green smoothies?
And finally, during some absolutely random court case in Durban, it was announced that R Kelly will not be called in to testify. Apparently the accused, a woman arrested for defrauding pensioners, implicated R Kelly (yes, that Michael Jackson wanna-be) as an accomplice. And our brave prosecutors actually managed to get a statement from him and decided not to summon him to court.
I wonder how much play these stories will get today in the shadow of the 2010 World Cup strike agreement and other important global events.
On a serious note, a story worth reading is the one about the couple who committed suicide at a clinic in Switzerland. As a journalist, not much penetrates my skin, but this story did. It's tragic, beautiful and perfect.
* A small problem with the Merc AMG is that it was stolen and is currently missing in action. It was spotted in Swaziland, but remains illusive. If you can find it, maybe you can keep it. And, since it belonged to a politician, it probably had the Johnnie Walker in the boot. (A bit of trivia: A few weeks ago I actually got an MEC fired for splashing out R920 000 for a Merc but not bothering to insure it. It was hijacked from her husband less than 24 hours after it left the showroom).